The Floridian Fly in Yr Hybrid Refuses to Eat an Orange at WIERD...

Tuesday May 16th, 2006

This week at WIERD!!! Get a free drink if you go into the ladies room at midnight and put your face very close to the mirror, look fiercely into your little black coldwave eyes and silently whisper with an ever so slight Frenchwave lisp, "Blog, blog, blog..." say thee ever so majickal word 12 you have the power to come out alive...very rare...

Yes, right(as the English might say) I feel very confident in saying that I'm quite sure its absolutely no coincidence that the new Honda Hybrid SUV looks EXACTLY like my vintage 2005 Motor-Ola sellfoam and yesterday my very rare supspicions were confirmed.  I pulled up to a stoplight behind a blue Hybrid(which by the way ever since I was a coldwave kid every time I do a tiny voice in my head begins mumbling Jah Rasta, Jah Rasta...) in thee Wierdmobile, and as I happened to be wearing my favorite purple crystal ring I saw through the windshield the entire spectrum of colors - the 3 colors of thee Jah Rasta light, the blue hybid, my purple ring, and as I was about to plow into the neighboring telephone pole from the sadness orange was missing (yeah whatever dont believe me I dont even coldwave care) I turn my head to the left and theres a little old Mexican lady selling oranges, YES, amazing, God is finallly here.  So I summoned thee little mysterious rainbow queen over to my non hybrid and asked for 1 orange which she handed me, 'thankyou dahling, now I can see thee light!'...So I look up and indeed the wild rainbow lightning struck hard as low and behold the car in front of me was not only a blue hybrid, but the Florida license plate #s were the last 7 digits of my sellfone number.  I immediately had two responses 1. this is very rare and 2. OK the hybrid looks exactly like my sellfone and now is admitting to it finally(even though the design director of Honda denies it as i posted a message to him on the site last week), another victory for the WIERD!...Thing is then I began to think, OK if I'm outside my phone looking down on it, the rainbow makes complete sense...Just then the Rasta Jah'd green and my little sellfone drove away.  I realized at that point that what I was feeling like at that very moment was I must be a perfect personification of a text message sent by the hybrid fone, and that when that little Mexican orange entered my car the text was sent, and off I went into thee coldwave sky...I wasn't quite sure what to do next and in the anxiety of all the horns behind me blaring for me to move I picked up ms. 'Ola' and instinctively sent a text to my only very rare friend in Florida, trying to word the text as if the phone itself were speaking to him, 'Pieter ate the orange to create thee rainbow of power, and from this he realized I AM THE HYBRID!!! and now I am sending him to you! VERY RARE!'...I had pulled off the road by now and was slowly unpeeling and eating my orange, putting the peels next to my still opened phone in a nice neat dark synth pile.  a very small fly was circling the pile, but instead of landing on the peels it landed on my phone.  I figured if the phone was a Honda Hybrid the little fly must be me...very rare...I've secretly always wanted to kill a fly with my sell and now was my chance, but if the fly was me the bad majik might set in at any moment if I killed him in his little car.  Regardless I did it anyway, and the little gluey guts went all over the buttons.  at that moment I got out of my car, opened the little hybrid car in my hand, and put the dead fly in my mouth as I figured the only way to prevent myself from being killed in a car accident was to eat the evidence.  Precisely then the second I stepped back into my car, my friend texted me back, 'whatever fag, Florida sucks'...Obviously there was 1 possible response to him, 'Very rare...' ...WIERD...

Pieter and Glenn refuse to discuss the color Orange
Tuesday, May 16th, 11pm - 4am
WIERD @ Southside Lounge
(Happy hour and special 'League of Nations' retrospective midnight - 1am!!!)
41 Broadway(Wythe/Kent)
J train to Marcy, L to Bedfd