The WIERD would Simply 'Prefer not to'...

Tuesday, August 9th, 2005

So I was delighted to discover my bathroom had a few obscure technical problems this morning as it gave me yet again another excuse to sneak into my my 55 yr old coldwave Russian landlord's apartment(who no shit just had her 1st baby at 55, very rare) to secretly read her huge collection of 'ladies' magazines, she subscribes to my 3 faves - 'Redbook', 'Motherhood', and 'Ms.'  So in the suspense of potentailly being caught in my intense reading I first took the quiz in the new 'Redbook', "How to Tell if you are Lonely", and I was very happy to discover I am NOT lonely(i scored '28% lonely, pretty good i think), then I took the test, "How to tell if you are pregnant" in the new 'Motherhood' and to my pleasant surprise I discovered I'm pregnant.  Thing is both mags said only HOW to tell, not who, but 'Motherhood' suggested calling your physician, so of course I did.  "Hello, Greg Dillon speaking", "Oh hi Pieter, so nice to hear from you, how's your health?"  "Oh pretty good Greg(he said I could call him 'Greg' because we both 'love the arts'), I just learned I'm definitely not lonely and I'm pregnant!"  "Oh Pieter thats wonderful, have you been thinking of names"  "Yes of course, I'm expecting a girl and her name will be Cindy"  "Oh thats a nice name, how's your Mom doing?"  "She's well, she just got a new invisible fence so the dog won't run away"  "Whats an invisible fence, Pieter"  "Oh you know its like a fence but there's no fence, kind of like decaf coffee, O'Doul's, or buying real estate with 'no money down'"  "Oh I see, how's the fishing"  "Great, I caught 2 Northern Pike last week at 2am on my new 3/8 ounce 'Hula Popper', and one of them smiled at me"  "Always nice to hear from you Pieter"  "Bye Greg, thanks man"...So come down to WIERD this week for Cindy's baby shower, Ben is going to be her Godmother, wish us the best...very rare, and maybe even...WIERD..

Pieter and 3:1:G spin Coldwave
Tuesday August 9th, 11pm-4am
WIERD @ Southside Lounge
(Happy Hour midnight-1am!!!)
41 Broadway(Wythe/Kent), Wmsbrg, BKNY
J train to Marcy, L to Bedford